Prediction or Projection?

 These next 2 entries in my blog are about a series of dreams that have haunted me since I was 4. I wanted to be able to speak about this as a rational thinking person…open to all suggestions or possibilities.  And also to address 3 words that I have heard over and over since I was 4….specifically “Heal The Earth”. 

 I have had a very interesting and years long debate with Friends, Family, and anyone who would care to contribute over ESP and dreaming. For a dear friends part, he’s aware that there is a thing called ESP(extra sensory perception), but he’s not entirely convinced that it is so much a mystery; rather than the innate ability to project yourself forward or backward in a straight verses an arc time-line, to see that future or past event. He argues that even science has proven that time does not travel in a straight line-rather it travels in an arc, so someone who uses ESP, is just projecting themselves forward or backward out of  their current place in a straight-line, which would be a short cut so to say, circumventing the arc and this person is projecting him or herself in a straight line to a direct destination in time and space to see what is occurring.Wow!! The ability to separate yourself from your physical body and intentionally project yourself forward or backward in the time-line, to hover above a certain incident in time in that arc…..I find that thought utterly fascinating!

 For my part, I have always had ESP (mainly in dreams) since I was 4 yrs old, and was in a bad car wreck. But it was always with my Guide(a woman) and the Guardian(a HUGE soldier in complete uniform). The Guardian appeared on the hill just moments before we crashed and I pointed him out to my Mother.  He was intently watching us and then held out his hands as if in a sign to stop or lessen the damage. My brother, who was 2 at the time, saw him also, he screamed and said No! No!  The Guardian looked straight at me, and even though he was about an 1/8 of a mile away on a hill-top, I could see his eyes. And still to this day…if I close my eyes- I can recall the color and intensity of his eyes …the impact was that deep! He has always been there and most of the time I will never see him. But there is one exception…if I am in extreme danger. He shows up… He never says a word, he just shows up to silently warn me or protect me…I cannot help but watch him and follow his cue.  And believe me….I owe him!

 The Guide is another matter. She wears a white sort of gown with a pattern that runs across the bodice and down the front of the dress. The sleeves have fringe that can and will  turn to feathers. She wears a belt that has some sort of braided cord or leather–but instead of 3 strands there are 4 that end with tassels of actual corn the color of white, yellow, blue, and red.  Even though I could sense that She would never hurt me; I was terrified when she showed up. And I can’t stress this enough… I knew to the core of my being, she would never allow any harm to come to me…period!. I absolutely knew that NOTHING would or could harm me while She was there(nothing would think to or dare to). Instead I was terrified of what She showed me and how we went there! 

 When I was small, I could sense Her presence and that of the Guardian in the room with me at night. Even though I couldn’t see them at the time, visibly, I could if I closed my eyes. I don’t know if that makes any sense. Think of it as being blind and walking into a room with someone in there. Even if that person doesn’t make a sound you sense they are there…. your senses can sort of “see” them. After a while you just kind of get used to being able to sense their presence. I would do everything I could think of not to fall asleep- but sleep would eventually win out….all in the space of about 5 minutes. She would come through the wall and gently tap my forehead and literally separate me from  my sleeping body, and we would go walking or flying. Her entrance into my dreams always occurs the same way. She comes through the East wall of whatever room I’m in at the time. And you can smell her companions also, for she always comes with a huge bear with laughing eyes, and a wolf,  sometimes deer or elk, sometimes with a huge cougar, and a fish…(I know, I know) an actual fish that lives outside the water. She also carries a blue-white orb of light in her right hand, and this orb is not like the light of enlightenment. Instead it’s like a key that is used to travel from one place to the other.  I was terrified of the wolf when I was small, because when my Guide came through the wall,  she would take out his yellow eyes and place them above the door to my room in a dream, to remind me not to leave the room and to keep me safe.  And if we have to travel far in the dream, my guide will turn into an eagle complete with feathers and grab my arm in her talons and fly us to the destination she has in mind. Her companions always seem to keep up on the ground or maybe we are just all swept up in the energy and are transported at the same time.

   I can honestly say that I am probably Her most reluctant student! If you can visualize a cartoon version of a student digging her nails in the ground and screaming and kicking as she is being drug  all the way into the classroom….Ahem!    ….That’s me! It has taken me many years to understand just a tiny fraction what She has shown me. The one thing She keeps emphasizing over and over… ”Heal The Earth”.  For the longest time I tried to run away from it and do everything I could to not dream, to just try to forget it and blow it off…. that is as fruitless as trying not to breathe. Now I have learned to accept them and give myself permission accept  Her….and myself….but it is a work in progress…a lifetime of work.

 But what if my friend is correct? What if the Guide is actually an astral projection of myself, coming back time, to prepare me for some future event? I think that the idea is interesting. That would make astral projecting, the time travel that scientists have all been looking for. And would certainly provide answers and new discoveries and cures. But that theory also does not take into account the presence of my Guide AND the Guardian, and yes, they do know of and are aware of each other. They work with each other….not for-as a servant/boss….but with each other…each has a different function. They are 2 completely separate beings- and I say beings because while they are definitely human form; they seem to be able to shape-shift into whatever is necessary for the job. When I would try to deliberately focus on my Guide to see her with my eyes, I would become dizzy, because her eyes and skin and hair are a different color every time, but you know at the same time that it is Her. She laughed a lot about that and said not to worry because I was still blind….but soon I would learn not to see her with my eyes, but instead to SEE her with my being…”close your eyes and see with your senses…there is a whole other world that we really do not see or realize exists.”

  Ahem! Ever try to explain that one to your parents or friends? I tried…they still think I’m somewhat crazy, but too much about my dreams and too many of the dreams have come true…complete down to details of smells  and feeling the heat from flames, winds, etc. That was what distinguished these dreams from regular ones…the whole reality of them.   Mainly though–my Family and Friends just don’t want to hear about it anymore.  I have talked to several different Shamans and healers about the dreams trying to understand just what it is that my Guide meant with some of the dreams and some of what she has said, but the answer has always remained elusive until the actual event has happened.

For some reason, it wasn’t until my 50th birthday and I went through a Sweat, that the dreams became more insistent, demanding to be recognised. Repeating themselves over and over in more minute detail until I thought I would go crazy. I finally accepted the fact I was maybe being shown something very important and I have to really pay attention and decipher what her words mean.  I didn’t want to, but it was time to start. She said I was a Witness and a Healer…a kind of Bridge of sorts,  that is my job. I’m an observer that is here to bear record to all of this……[feel free at anytime folks to step in and help me out here....to record all of just what--I have no clue.] She would show me a series of events that are horrifying to see…I will be screaming and crying, frantically clawing her arms and hands trying to get away, but I never can. Instead She holds onto me and makes me watch the scene unfold.  Then afterwards she will hug me close and comfort me, and then bend down and take my face in her hands and look deep into my eyes and firmly say….”Heal the Earth!”

 Now may I at this time inject some sort of noise, say maybe… scratching on a record or something  to that effect?  Uh! Yeah! Right!…SAY WHAT???!!! Just what do you mean “Heal the Earth”??? Like how? And with what???!!! AND… Do you know what the normal reactions of Family and Friends or just ordinary people are? Scoffing, clearing their throats, sighing, shuffling their feet with uncomfortable postures and expressions, snorting, uncomfortable giggling, and them walking quickly away shaking their heads. Yeah Right, Earth Mother…you just go “Heal the Earth”!!!! Any credibility you may have had up till that point vanishes in the puff of a breath! So what to do? You become a Solitary!

 So this is the preface to the next Blog entry about the dream of how I know this house itself…..I’ll let you decide and Please! If you honestly know about this or what it means or have had a similar experience chime in here! Any help would be greatly appreciated. Peace and Blessings.

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